


Men Of Low Character

by DickDale



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Blood and Gore, Drug Abuse, F/F, Gen, Man this is gonna s u c c, Music references as if it was a jojo part, Recreational Drug Use, or be great, probs both idk, vigilantes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:35:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23439274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DickDale/pseuds/DickDale
Summary: In a crime ridden beachtown filled with mythical creatures, a Bio-Weapon, a mermaid, an oracle and an automata are forced to make a team and murder a drug lord.





	1. The Band

“Hey, the boss wants to see ya…”

Mariah was awoken from her half-slumber by a voice she knew a bit too well. Low, oddly charming and with a vaguely Jamaican accent. Carla Santos was standing next to her desk, and she wasn't here to hit on her.

Shit had definitely hit the fan.

“...What does he need?”

Her question was answered only with a small shrug.

“Fuck me, i don't know. He called me too, and Creedence, so i am pretty sure we aren't getting sacked…” The woman growled, shaking her hand as if to swat away an invisible fly. “Look, just show up, you know he gets real bitchy at times…”

“He doesn't get real bitchy, he is real bitchy” Mariah said mostly to herself as she got up, following her partner into the office.

Now is a good moment to come clear about some stuff. First of all, Mariah doesn't exactly work some sort of cushy 9-to-5 desk job, she is actually a Stray Cat. A member of a group that hits the thin line between “Vigilante group” and “Bunch of psychos”. They have one job, to walk into a room, kill/stop/disappear whoever they got paid to kill/stop/disappear and then clean up the mess left behind.

Of course, in any functional society this sort of group would be quickly disbanded and have its funding members executed by shooting squad. But, sadly, this is definitely not a functional society we are talking about.

Cussing everything out, Mariah walked into the fancy room that her boss called an office but which in reality was closer to being his home. She had never seen him walk out of it, and she usually stayed in the place until midnight in order to avoid going home.

“Mh, Mariah, you came” Said the man as soon as she stepped in, wasting no time in greetings or formalities. 

She looked around. Apart from Carla, she was in the room with a pale and sickly looking male with dark sunglasses, the aforementioned Creedence. Nodding a bit, she sat in one of the fancy wooden chairs and answered with a stone faced “I did”.

“I will be quick” Said the grown man, setting a file down. “You have a new case”.

The news were received with a complete lack of emotion. He continued after a small pause in which the air was filled with raw awkwardness.

“You will kill The Walrus”

And then the emotion shined through, in a confusing mix of indignation and shock.

“You’ve got to be shitting me” Said Mariah.

“Sadly, i am not. I know it is a bit rushed…”.

“It is fucking nuts”.

“...But it is a now or never situation.” He continued, not bothered by Mariah’s sudden interruption.

“Why not send a strike team or something? Grab a sniper and blow his head off whenever he walks out of his mansion, that should do”. Spoke Creedence.

“Because that is a bit too loud and obvious. The minute he knows we are onto him, everyone in the building will get shot. It needs to be discreet, it needs to be quick and it needs to be done now.”

“...So you are throwing us three and praying that we somehow manage to kill him? Brilliant.”

The man groaned, clearly growing exasperated at his underlings.

“You are not alone. You have our funds, you have our weapons and you have him.” He said, using his index finger to point at what seemed to be a statue that had so far been lurking in the background.

“Thank god we have an...uhm...clay statue” Carla spoke, struggling not to roll her eyes at her boss.

“Hilarious, now say hi to Bangalter…”

As soon as he finished speaking, the statue walked towards the desk with a series of slight creeks, its arms and legs moved rather slowly, but that didn't stop it from scaring the trio. The boss looked at this with a proud smile, almost as if he was rejoicing in their fear.

“One-hundred fifty kilograms of aluminium and copper, thermal vision and enough guns to fend off a small army. Maneuvered by a very angry ghost...and made to keep an eye on you.” He finished the sentence off with a glare.

“So, before you guys try and rebel against me, remember : You don't have an option. You will either come out of this in a bodybag or with a new rank…” Again, he smiled. Ice cold and creepy as always. “Don't disappoint me. I assembled this team to cover every possible base. We have our good friend Bangalter to get the heat...” He pointed at Creedence “...a prophet for the intel work…” Then at Carla “...a mermaid for the diplomacy...” And lastly, at Mariah “...And...uh, i'm not sure what you are, but you are meant to do the fighting. Now, go to bed, we start tomorrow morning”

Just like that, he shooed them out of his office.

Mariah stormed out and made a beeline for the place’s bathroom, ignoring the comments from her co-workers and trying to get some calm and quiet and to get her head to stop spinning.

From the moment she woke up, Mariah somehow knew that her day was going to be ruined by something. It was odd, but she knew that a something or a someone would come out of left field to drop a deuce in her day, leaving behind a grumpy husk.

What she didnt know is that it would be her boss telling her to team up with two other people and beat up a crime lord. That was a new one.


	2. Valerie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mariah and Carla pay a visit to a woman who used to be with The Walrus.

Mariah woke up, showing once more that dreams don't always come true. If they did, then she would have been dead a long, long time ago. Tired, she quickly got dressed and exited the crashed train that she, alongside twenty other members of her species, called “Home”. She made her way through St. Stephen in silence, the clock had just hit seven a.m and the usually chaotic main streets were eerily silent and calm, only a few drunks and beggars were laying in the sidewalks.

To Mariah, St. Stephens was essentially a city-sized garbage dump. Filled to the brim with criminals, snobby rich families and idiots. She didn't know too much about its history and cared even less, but she did know that it was practically made to stash all the non-humans far away from the civilized society. 

And it worked.

After a nice walk where she hated on the city, the world and especially, herself, Mariah arrived at the Stray Cat’s office, answering to a couple of welcomings with vague grunts before walking to her superior’s office where her boss and “teammates” (To put it in some way) where already waiting.

“Not even going to try and punish you for being late” Said her boss, welcoming as always. Mariah answered with a small “Fuck you” and sat at the table, where a couple of paper pictures and notes layed. 

“So, if you two are done with the arguing, then we can get to the point…” Spoke Creedence, stopping for a bit before continuing “...Thank you. So… we don't have many leads since this guy kind of...kills everyone that crosses him, but we do know where one of his ex-side pieces lives and she might just have some good intel. It is worth the shot. 317, Bonham street, 3B” He said, pointing at an old photo which showed a rather well endowed blonde.

“Thanks, Creedence… Carla, Mariah, get on that.” Said the boss, sounding oddly disinterested before focusing his attention in a handful of papers. The pair just stood there in silence.

“That’s it? No advice? No info on what we are looking for?” Said Carla.

“You aint gonna have your boyfriend follow us?” Mariah pointed at Bangalder, which was just sulking in a corner like always.

“It isn't that hard. You two are supposed to be professionals, act like it. Now go and bring back something useful, will you?”

The girls both wished to slam his head against his desk until it was just a red pulp but, sadly, that is illegal. Instead they just conformed with the mental image and went to do their job.

After a brief, but painfully silent car ride, they arrived at the rather crummy department building, getting a few ugly looks due to their uniform. Hesitant, Carla knocked on the wooden door and waited.

She was soon answered by a women that matched the photo quite well. Blonde hair and pale skin, but she looked far less beautiful than in the image. Maybe the years had taken their toll, maybe it was just the fact that she had gotten an unexpected visit at eight A.M and wasn't dolled up, probably both.

“...Fuck are you?” Asked the woman, her voice had a serious smoker’s rasp which coupled with her odd accent made guessing what she was saying a hard task.

“Hello. I am Santos and this is Delaware, we are Stray Cats…” She said, showing the woman the purple jacket that all of them wore. “I take it you are Valerie Ronson.”

“We think you may have some informat-” Began Mariah, before being promptly cut off.

“Look, if this is about The Walrus you can turn around and leave. Our thing ended a long time ago and i haven't heard about him in years…”

“Don't worry we are sure that you have something that will be useful...Mind if we talk inside?” Said Carla, taking the helm of the conversation. Being a mermaid, her voice had this odd ability to make you feel warm and content. Mariah might have gotten used to it by now, but for anyone that hasn't shared a job with her? It was like a drug. Valerie sighed and nodded, letting them in.

Her home wasn't exactly awful-looking. A good amount of space and some not-so-bad furniture, but it still made you feel uncomfortable. Valerie clearly wasn't worried about keeping it clean, as evidenced by the used clothes and small mounds of trash dropped in the floor, and the whole place just had a weird air of negativity and sadness. The mermaid sat in one of the chairs with the woman while Mariah choosed to just roam around idly and search for clues, talking was definitely not her thing.

What felt like (and probably was) hours later, the two girls stepped up from their seats and, much to her surprise, hugged. Mermaids were definitely scary.

“So, what do you have?” Mariah asked once they walked out of the building.

“Well...apparently, before she left he bought one of the Sun King soda factories”

“A soda factory? Why the fuck would he do that? Money laundering?”

“Beats me. He either is moving from drugs to soft drinks or went fucking crazy...we should go investigate anyways.”

“How fucking fun…” Mariah muttered, putting her helmet on and getting on her bike.

"Lighten up, girl. If we have to do this, we should at least try and have some fun while at it..." Carla said, giving her a small grin and somehow with only that, managing to give the blonde a small heart attack

Maybe Mariah wasnt so inmune to charm.


End file.
